I remember when my girls were 6 or 7,
They were 10 months apart, completely different temperaments and then they would disagree.
They used to fight. Oof. It would get bad.
The need to fix things fast would flood over me, but in that gush of panic, I would also feel like I was drowning.
What was the right thing to say that would build them both up? What wouldn't damage them? What would stop the fight without someone being “wrong”? What would create peace?
Why couldn't everyone just be filled with sunshine and rainbows All the Time!
Now, 10 years later... I just heard them go to their rooms to do their schoolwork for the day... and calling out “I Love you” to each other.
And I breathe.
During those frantic days, there was always a call from the back of my mind, to stop pushing, to stop worrying and to pull out the spiritual, mindful tools I'd known for years.
Sometimes, I just didn't trust my heart and I'd go down a rabbit hole of trying to “fix” things.
But then other times... I'd practice mindful awareness .and spiritual connection and it would all take a different shift. It would ease.
Just the right words would flow from my mouth... or no words at all.... I'd just sit and listen and hug and help.
Our girls would realize that they were having mutual bad days and discover something deeper about themselves and about each other... with me as an anchor of love rather than a force field of Fixing Chaos.
Since those days, I've always had the desire for that cheer-leading team which would have told me to trust the moment more.
I really needed that “TRUST YOUR HEART” banner being waved in my face, in those early years and some breadcrumb reminders of how to do it when things got dark.
Because no matter what, it always gets dark sometimes.
There will always be days when we forget how to be ourselves, how to connect to our inner guides and how to be heart focused... rather than logically fearful.
We're surrounded by what to be fearful of, aren't we? The scales tip in the direction of “what to avoid...” and “don't let your kids do this or they will turn out to be that.” In today's world it is so easy to get caught up in how things Look, rather than how they really feel.
So, over time, I've chosen to raise the Trust Your Heart Banner for other people... and while doing so provide simple tools to help parents find their grove of heart centered parenting.
I discovered, and continue to discover, breadcrumbs along the way... to help make inner connection, Spirit connection, a simple, every day experience, so that it doesn't give me bouts of anxiety if my children have bad days.
(My daughter turned to me the other day and said “Mom, you've given us so many tools to create our own inner happiness. It's really up to us now if we live a happy life or not.” at 15, it made me a pretty proud mom.)
The thing that has consistently surprised and delighted me about being a mom, is the fact that it always turns out better when I tune into my inner self.
A stressful moment always turns more stressful if I'm focused on the outer experience.
What I mean by that is, when I'm focused on the words coming out of my mouth, rather than the intention behind them.
When I'm focused on what kind of parent I'm looking like, vs what kind of person I'm being.
When I'm focused on how my children are behaving, rather than what they are internally processing.
It's never what we think it is.
Life just unfolds better when we live it from the inside out.
But it's hard to turn that leaf. The world often demands us to back up our outer realities.
“But what are they learning?” “But how will they learn their lesson?” “But what will it turn out like?” We can be asked by families and friends alike.
And so, we need a system in place.
More than a community, rather a petrol station to refuel our spiritual tanks and our conscious parenting filters.
We need to know we aren't alone... and yet have the tools to be alone and connect to a much greater, greater whole.
Because THAT is what this is all about.
Parents feel drained out, spent, overwhelmed, underappreciated and scattered to pieces a good part of the time.
When we have a fuel station in place, we can breathe. We can stop. We can pause in our moments and know that we can find center.
We can go within.
We can connect to our own spiritual Source and Guides. (and wouldn't it be nice to be given some tools to remind us how to in the chaos...).
We can also look at ourselves, go within, tweak what needs tweaking, and then put some simple steps in place to find peace and joy within our families and homes for things to run smoothly again.
In a good fuel station, there's also tools to pass on that sense of center and inner joy to our children as well, so spirituality is an expanding force moving through all working parts of our lives.
There's a new place for the Spiritually Aware Parents to fuel up.
It's called... The Breathing Space.
This membership will begin small.
There will be tools for you to use, in the form of recorded workshops and mini-courses, in a password protected site.
There will also be an actively engaged Facebook Community where you will have access to LIVE online workshops covering a range of spiritual tools and conscious parenting techniques, you will also be given a weekly meditation circle and a variety of “challenge” focuses for accountability and supported shifting to the life you want to live with your kids.
The Breathing Space is supposed to be just that.
A place for parents so they can stop and breathe.
Because I remember when my kids were little, it felt like I was drowning sometimes..
and it often felt like everything would change if I could just find a space to have a few gasps of air.
And please, remember to...
Trust your heart. Go within. and Stop, pause... and
Write something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview.